Friday, May 2, 2008

Next year

Middle school is a tough place to be these days.  The kids are mean to each other, the teachers are doing their best, some are doing better than others at inspiring the kids, helping them learn.  But it is a place where my child (#2) has not yet found "his place".  So I worry about his self-esteem, his view of his place in the world.  I worry that he won't recover easily from this horrid place he has to go to every day.  He is becoming more and more someone I don't know.  The kid who likes to talk has become someone who is scared of saying anything in front of other people.  

He is making it, though.  He is somehow surviving.  I see that he has a bright future despite what he is told about himself during school hours.  I try to convey that to him, but he is doubtful right now.  He needs to find his spot on the planet.  

I am not saying he is not "odd".  He likes Legos still.  He is in 7th grade and still wants to be a little boy.  He is innocent in some ways.  He is learning, though, sadly to be someone who might could be mean back.  

He doesn't want to believe me when I tell him what he truly IS.  I am just "dumb Mom", you know.  He doesn't want to give his best when everyone else is skating by.  He wants to shut down and curl up in a ball and "survive".  But I can see so much better for him.  I want him to see himself as God sees him.  He is a pretty wonderful kid and we have much to be thankful for.   
Next year, #2 and #3 will be in this environment.  They will both be subjected to the mean, vile side of youth.  The atmosphere in our house will likely change forever.  I have to remind them right now to be nice to each other.  What will it be like then?  I can only hope and pray........

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