Mini Family Reunion

#4 with my cute nephew - some of my favorite moments were seeing them interact with their cousins.  We see each other so little and there is a comfort level that they have with each other.

This photo was towards the beginning of the trip when my preschooler niece wasn't real comfortable with me.  But, I wedged her in-between me and #2 and she was very happy sitting there for a while.
These two are favorites of each other.  #3 and my niece have a quiet understanding of each other.
This picture of me is a picture of me in heaven.  Having my two nieces on my lap and happy with me and each other was sooooo fun.  It brings tears to my eyes thinking of it.  We see each other so little and they are so sweet (not to mention beautiful).  
The Risk marathon that was finally a "draw":

The most beautiful baby in the world (and this picture doesn't do her justice with her curly brown locks, dark blue eyes, perfect mouth and precious dimples - I could go on and on.....):

I am sadly having niece/nephew withdrawal!!  I spent the last few days at my parents' home in the country.  All of my siblings were there except my brother who is halfway around the world.  We didn't do much, just hung out....well the "men" did have a marathon Risk game with my youngest sister playing war consultant to all four of them.  Other than that, we cooked, held babies, watched the kids play and talked.  It was very enjoyable.  There were many times of almost "head-butting" when we couldn't agree on something, but coming away without a complete "episode" was a major miracle.  (I guess it is because there are so many strong-willed people involved.)  We each deferred a little (or a lot) to the others and we all made it through.  

Sunday was a especial trial for me as I wanted to go to the church we grew up in, but my dad had a planned preaching engagement at a small (think tiny), country church near their home.  I was very out of sorts the whole drive to church thinking of fighting my kids in a small church "on display" for everyone to see.  But, the service was enjoyable, the people were friendly, and the kids were fine.  My youngest sister didn't drive in for church, but she came later with "po-boys" for everyone.  That was a real "food" highlight.  We all wanted a small taste of food from our taste memories without going out and wrangling 7 kids.  It was delicious!  We also had king cake (with special fillings) and my sister cooked a really good, all-out meal of baked chicken, veggies, and rice for Saturday night.  

The kids, I have to say, were the highlight, though.  "Little baby" niece is so pleasant (never cries) and easy-going, the big brother is adorable playing with his football and asking to watch the game during Sunday dinner (he's only 2), the preschooler niece is sweet, fun and slowly warming up to everyone more, and even my kids in their teen and pre-teen angst were sweet, charming, mature (at least more so than usual), helpful with the babies and fun!  

We left at 7:00 PM last night, so the drive for my honey was torturous, but he wouldn't let me drive.  We got in at 12:00 AM and went straight to bed.  So now, instead of getting caught up, I am sitting here blogging....I really must go unpack and do some laundry.  The kids go back to school tomorrow and I have a birthday party to plan for Saturday.  

New Years Puzzle Marathon

The last two days, we have been on a puzzle-making marathon.  We did get out this AM to go "make groceries" as they call it in my home state.  Then, this PM, we went to the new Bass Pro.  How I LOVE those stores!!  We had a great time on this little field trip, shopping (mostly window shopping), shooting, seeing the stuffed animals, and dreaming of very big boats and great outdoor vacations.  

Back to the puzzles, we finished one of a old-time schoolhouse (500 pieces) and are now working on a picture of San Francisco (also vintage-looking - 500 pieces).  Yes, I realize those were very easy ones, so the next one we have picked out is 1000 pieces, and a very hard puzzle almost completely in gray and white, a picture of a wolf pack.  My younger two sons picked it out.  I don't relish the thought of doing that one.  Leaving the store, I made all three younger kids raise their right hands and promise to stick with it and not leave Mom doing it all by herself.  We will see how far that goes.....

I also had a beautiful, new faucet installed by "Mr. Handyman" himself, fixed a wonderful soup for supper, talked to my brother and his family via modern technology, and enjoyed my family since everyone was home again today.  

I don't relish the thought of the kids starting back to school  They have three days left.  I feel myself beginning to mourn.  I will enjoy seeing my friends again, but I will miss my kids and I sooooo hate how homework completely takes over our lives!!  Enough griping.....I will put a happy face on for them.  And enjoy the last few days of holiday.

Things at home

Most of you know me very well and therefore know that I have four children.  They are 17, 14, 12, and 9.  So, I have three who are teenagers, or at least two "official" teenagers and one who is "hot on their heels".  Then I have a 9 year old who is at times a sigh of relief in our home and at other times, another emotionally complex being in our home.  

Emotionally complexity....that is some of what this entry is about. But, it is also about being together and quite simply, being a team.  Because I am trying to respect my children's privacy, I will not elaborate on what all the "insanity" is.  Just know that right now, our home is an emotionally complex place to be.  There are a few sane moments here and there, but mostly, we are very emotionally charged and that isn't always a good thing.  Even when things are good for one, that might mean that they are bad for another.  When one has a friend over, sometimes the others are very unhappy with that.  When one is doing well, another one is not and is not happy about it.  When one is getting attention, another one needs it and is letting us know.  So, we press forward, my husband and I "pooling" our saneness when we can and supporting each other in every way.  

Sometimes I feel that it is almost too much to expect everyone to ride in the car together or sit down to eat together.  I know, though, that the days of togetherness are short because the kids are growing up quickly, so I fight for the "team" every chance I get.  I fight for family outings, family dinners (with manners), family movies, and family devotions.  As we give some of ourselves to become a team, we become part of something bigger than ourselves - our family.  I believe in teamwork.  My family will fight me because they are each becoming their own person and I want that, but I also want them to continue to learn to give a little (or sometimes a lot).  Hopefully, we are finding a happy medium.  Meanwhile,  I hope I am not asking them to give up too much of themselves.  

Along those lines, last weekend, we were desperate to get our kids out of the house.  When we announced a family outing, our kids immediately started whining.  We almost gave up, but we pressed forward, making (and I do mean MAKING - for one of them physically) them go to a local preserve to walk in the woods for a bit and see the beautiful boulders there.  As we drove up, their complaining became very vocal.  But, again, we pressed forward. To sum it up, we ended up having a very blessed time running around, climbing (smaller) boulders, and watching the "pros" climb the really big boulders.  

Later that evening, we bought a "fire pit", ate supper around the fire and for a final touch, made s'mores in our backyard.  It made for a memorable day.  For the most part, they were cooperative (at least after the initial display of rebellion).  And everyone enjoyed it and had a good time.  AND, my fighting for the team turned out really well.  After the kids wandered off their different ways that evening, my husband and I felt very warm outside AND in sitting around the fire, enjoying the cool evening and braving the smoke blowing in our faces.  You, my dear reader, enjoy the pictures and have a good time in your family, fighting for the team!! 

On We Grow, Learning What We Can....

The school year has only just begun.  The kids are doing well, but not exactly happy.  I don't know how I feel.  I feel that some of the time, I need the freedom and am enjoying it.  Other times, I feel that I need to be with my kids and savor their time in my household.  They seem so grown-up and very close to leaving my "nest".  I know for a fact that one day I will be doing something else.  I know that I am in a "training" or "holding pattern" for now.  I am a minister to my children and "snatches" for other people such as my girls at church and the ESL students I teach on a volunteer basis. 

As far as my children, I feel that my time with them is significant for what they teach me sometimes more than for what I teach them.  But, I do hope that they are learning some skills that only maturity (NOT!!) or age can bring.  One thing that seems to be a recurring theme is "Never, never, never give up!!" Also, I hope they learn that life is not necessarily supposed to be fun. I hope they learn that a lot of times, the fun you have is while you are doing something that is fulfilling, often hard or even back-breaking "work".  That the times when you are happiest is when you are contributing to a bigger, greater good.  For me, that is the most important piece of sage advice that I can pass on.  I love them deeply, greatly and want they to be happy.  But their happiness will have to play "second fiddle" to developing them as people.  They MUST get this!!  They can and they WILL!!  And they must get that making others and God happy comes before pleasing their own flesh.  And when they please others and God, they ultimately please themselves.  That is TRUTH!!!  

So, for now, they stay in school, working hard, learning all they can about themselves and others.  They stay away from me 8-3 or so, and then the intense 3-8 time, I try my best to fit as much discipleship in as I can.  I try to encourage them get some chores done, along with the (at times) loads of homework they have.  I try to fit in family activities and a dinner together (not always).  And there does seem to be time for pure, unadulterated FUN!!  

The perfect accessory

My sister is here to visit (or more realistically to flee the wrath of Gustav), along with my nephew and three week-old niece.  I have decided that the perfect accessory to any human - adult or child- is a well-loved and cared-for baby!!!!  My beautiful niece, has been the object of my obsession with picture-taking, along with the person who is holding her at the time.  Here is the proof......

My Brother's Departure

As we prepare for my brother  and his family to return to the mission-field, I am feeling very glum and reflecting on their time here in our town.  It has been 11 years since we have been in the same town for a whole year and we have missed them.  

Our kids never really knew each other, but they have bonded.  The "cousins" are a great addition to our lives.  Previously, the times #3 and M.'s #1 have been together have been for short trips and quick family gatherings.  For this year, "the girls" were so totally in each others' lives, that they had their own ongoing games, their own "language", their own way of pretending, infinite sharing of books, and no - absolutely NO arguments.  Whatever their differences, the girls somehow find their own world where they agree on almost everything and enjoy each other's company so completely that no one else matters unless that someone is trying to separate them. 

For the boys on the other hand (speaking of my #4 and M.'s #2) they are hardly together on anything.  They can't agree on how to spend their time, what game to play or how to play it.  They irritate each other to the nth degree, but they have added to each others' lives.  They have taught each other the value of difference, but they never really figured out how to overcome them or give in enough to get along.  They have, despite their differences, enjoyed each other in some weird way and longed for each other.  It was just usually always a trial for the adult(s) caring for them.  

So for me, the change will be in two ways.  First, knowing that my brother (when he wasn't traveling), was only a couple of miles away.  There was comfort in that.  Second, for the change it will mean for my girl.  I weep for myself, but mostly for her.  She so bonded with her cousin that it will mean a sad change for her.  So, when the church had M. up for blessing and prayer this morning,  I was the only one weeping.  "M n M" feel very relieved to be going to where they "belong", to the place where God has called them.  The kids are oblivious, at least for the moment.  But I am sad.  So I weep.  I am sure that there are those who understand, but they are not immediately around me.  

This week, as they stay with us to prepare to leave, I determine to enjoy their company.  I promise to not think of the future and what it holds.  I will simply take deep breaths and stay calm, savoring the moments with them and the kids (even those of the two little boys arguing).

Tent Camping with the Experts

This is us with our friends from TN.  We had fun camping for one night at a state park about midway between the two.  We LOVE the W's!!!  I actually can't wait to do this again.  J. was nervous the whole time that it would rain and I wouldn't have fun (I have some horrible memories of camping all the way to Maine - "a la" raining so much that everything floated, leaving the tent flap open and our bedding getting wet, vomiting in the tent, etc.)  The W's have all the equipment and are experts backpackers, campers and LOVE hiking.  We were kind of "along for the ride".......

Scavenger Hunt

This picture was for a scavenger hunt for our church.  We tie-dyed the shirts (the kids wanted the letters added but that was a little "Laverne and Shirley-ish").  We got extra points for having our Bibles.  No one really had fun but me!!!

Memories from Band Concert

Last night was my middle-schooler's band concert.  At the last minute I invited my brother to come.  It was very fun.  He commented about getting up and dancing when the jazz band played "Twist and Shout".  I told him if he did, I would have to blog it because he would embarrass

me.  He said, "You are threatening me with publicity?" I laughed.  

What you might not know about my brother is that he likes publicity, but enjoys sometimes "flying low".  It is a strange combination.  

I find we are all a little like that.  We don't want to seem like we like attention and don't want to crave it, but we enjoy a little bit being "known".  The awesome thing for me right now -(I don't always remember this - but right now it is so clear) I am remembering who knows us the best, loves us the most and HE is the most important "being" in the universe.  It is great to be known by HIM.  It is great to be loved by HIM.  This kind of "knowing", though, makes you feel incredibly small... and that is a great feeling, too!!!  He knows us inside, outside, upside down!!! He loves us more than anyone else ever could!!!  Just ask HIM to reveal himself to you and reveal yourself to you.  That's right, HE knows you better than you know yourself......

Other memories from last night- having all the kids together enjoying one child's moment (no one detracting by bad behavior or being bratty), going out to eat at 9:00 at night and having no ice and my husband having to order over and over as what he ordered was always out (so many times that it got very funny), the kids enjoying each other and us, tiny middle-schooler in a tux with a "too-big" jacket (very cute!!), the drumline from the high school (black lights and all), the music - how fun!!!

You get the picture.  Yesterday was a VERY full day.  I got the kids off for school (harder than normal), met some friends, drove to "small town" 100 miles away and back by 3:00,  Did homework, got the oil changed in the car, got everyone ready for the concert (alone), got to the school 45 minutes early, waited, enjoyed the concert, went to eat, rushed home to fall into bed at 10:00.  Exhausted!!!  And there was a lot in the middle there, like listening to one of my favorite people speak (my friend and "sage"), connecting with God deeply (emotionally), driving and talking to my friends in the car - LONG DAY.....

Our Families

These are from Christmas, but the more I think about it, the more thankful I am for our families, and that we could all get together for a picture.  I love to look at our big, beautiful families and enjoy all the different people and personalities!!!  I appreciate everyone giving a little (or a lot) to get together....

Honey

What I love about my dog:

• Her sleeping all curled up on the sofa
  
• Her sleek red-brown coat, shiny, maybe the perfect hair color (hmmm....there's an idea)
  
• Her little gray muzzle, not too old, just seasoned
  
• Her waiting for me to settle on the sofa so she can curl up next to me
  
• Her way of communicating her needs by her specific barks, vocal whines, and exuberant, bouncy jumps
  
• Her running when she hears her leash rattle, my sock drawer close or the sight of me putting on my tennis shoes
• Her brown, sweet eyes
• Her "mean" growl and the way she gets very riled up when she is teasing (it looks so real if you don't know different)
• Her "big dog" attitude
• Her love of warm grass and loving to roll in it
• Her submissive, belly showing when she is wanting attention
• Her obedience in getting in her box when told to
• Her love of sleeping with the middle children (only)
• Her companionship
• Her unconditional love

Top Ten Things I Dislike About School

10. School smells and school germs

9.  Lots of crowd control (necessary, but still not my favorite thing)

8. Homework

7. Lots of little things that take time away from learning and don't help educate

6. Tasks that leave little room for a child's individuality

5. Kids that cause problems for the teachers and other kids (and their parents who don't care or try to do anything about it at home)

4. That school consumes the majority of the child's day and daylight hours, energy and drive to learn

3. Standardized testing - just too much of it!!!

2. IEP meetings (a big part of my school experience with one LD child and one child with PDD and I really, really dislike them)

1. The whole school experience is not conducive to an exceptional family/home life (basically boils down to not enough time with my kids to do what I feel called to do - share my faith, disciple them, go on outings, read to them, and countless other things)